Hello friends! Sure has been a long time since we threw anything up on the ol’ blog about the Seattle Mariners and their Major League Baseball team and players. I wonder if there is anything that has prevented us from meaningful discussion and topics? In anticipation of a gently-warming stove, and as a means of getting something cooked up while ownership and Rob Manfred bumble-stumble/shits themselves during CBA negotiations, we decided to field some questions from you, the readership.*

*Opinions wherein are that of David Skiba and do not reflect upon other members of the masthead. Please direct all anger and issues (fair or not) towards me. It’s only right.

With all that being said, and donning a pair of Robbie Ray’s pants (Ed’s note: Ouchy), let’s open some mail.

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“What’s the slogan this year?” – @jcole19

For YEARS I have been trying to get people to adopt “Turn Heel on the Teal” as a response to the “True to the Blue” seasons. If that doesn’t takeoff, I got nothing. “Farmer’s Only” seems appropriate to the organization’s long-term view at the minor league level. If neither of these seem immediate successes, I’d propose we petition for something like “The Garlic Fries Are Worse Now” to turn fans away from any potential on-field malaise.

“Is Rob Manfred the worst commissioner in the history of baseball?” – @eller11_s

First things first, we have to add the caveat that anyone who died before like 1985 is probably irredeemably racist. Accounting for the incredibly anti-labor past of Major League Baseball, it seems hard to blanket that Manfred is indeed the worst of all time. However, he’s certainly the worst imaginable, non-fireable commissioner in 2022. (Ed’s note: Most punchable face of any sports-related human at present.)

“A friend at work asked me if I should be a Mariners fan. I told them I care about them too much to recommend the Mariners. What team should I recommend them?” – @TaylorEdwardsNW

Assuming they’re West Coast, I’d personally choose the San Francisco Giants. Cool stadium, kinda under-doggy but generally in the mix. Padres are also fun and PetCo is cool. My ability to recommend the NL would stem from the institution of the universal DH, as without it, NL ball makes me want to push pencils through my eyes. Pitchers hitting is a disgusting ritual of lower-minded folk. If they’re willing to stay up late and watch games, the Pirates are like the NL Mariners but with a higher ceiling.

“Who do you think is a Mariner the longest out of Trammell, Sheffield, and Dunn?” – @colinmeals

An interesting question, and I think it depends on how you define “being a Mariner”. I don’t personally rate any of these three as here for long, but if the bounds of this question remain as “part of the entire organization” I think it’s maybe Trammell. He’s going to be a perennial 4th OF kinda guy, unless a lot really clicks, and soon. As such, I could see Jerry keeping him around for a few seasons in the tradition of a Ben Gamel or Casper Wells.

As far as most games played as a Mariner looking ahead, I think it’s gotta be Sheffield. They’ll give him another season, if not more to show if he can hang as a MLB starter before pushing him to long relief, testing him as a set-up guy, and we know the rest. I don’t think Sheffield or Dunn are starters on a team with a deep playoff run, but I’d say Justus is much more likely the candidate at this point.

“As of today, pending no other transaction, what is the floor and ceiling of the 2022 Seattle Mariners?” – @bad_sects

Personally, I think the ZiPS projection of 80-82 is fair for an average outcome of this current roster, if not a little better than my head. I think they’re more like a 78-84 team. I realize this amount of difference is meaningless so why am I writing that? For a ceiling, uhhhhh, well if the bullpen pulls off an entire season of unicorn magic AGAIN, maybe this team can flirt with something like 88 wins? The offense currently has huge holes/question marks at at least three positions, and maybe up to six (3B, LF, C, CF, DH/RF). Frazier is a fun add but, wow, they need to add some pop. Nelson Cruz is riiiight there.

As far as a floor, I mean, there’s a chance this current roster could get really ugly. What if Toro doesn’t have a torrid start to his Mariner career? What if this team actually starts Cal Raleigh at catcher? What if Kelenic is, well, that. Evan White exists! (Ed’s note: Citation needed) If the bullpen falls out and the offense doesn’t come around, the starting staff is nowhere near enough to limp this team to even 74 wins. There’s a chance this current roster could fail to break 70 wins, if the wheels came off it. If Torrens, Moore, Raleigh, and Toro have to provide significant time in the field, things could get really ugly.

“Did the retirement of Kyle Seager catch you by surprise? Is Toro the Mariners 3B of the future or someone else?” – @HDipoto

I was a bit surprised to not see him try and catch at least a camp invite to a team with deep playoff hopes, however it makes sense to me in the context of the looming CBA issues. Kyle’s got a family, plenty of (extremely deserved) cash, and I’d imagine you’ll be seeing him around the game soon. Feels like a lifer to me.

As far as Toro goes, I don’t personally rate him highly. I’d hope the Mariners 3B of the future is outside of the organization currently. Carlos Correa, please come soon. Maybe Noelvi Marte’s longterm future is at the hot corner?

“Playoffs or bust 2022?” – @JJarcThe12thMan

I ran a Twitter poll with this exact question at the beginning of the 2021 season, and I think consensus of more like 65% or so was “Yes”. Now, whether earned or not, I think Jerry has more goodwill thanks to the literally luckiest, by Pythag, result-over-performance season since the 80’s. If the Mariners do spend a bunch of money on actually good players who aren’t left-handed middle relievers, but fail to match their win total of last year, the project deserves more time. However, if it’s same-old, the-future-is-nigh talking points with a team that places 4th in the ALW, the Rangers should deservedly dance on the grave of this current front office. I’d put the odds of this front office being relieved of duties after 2022 at under 10%. Also, who is the Seattle Mariners General Manager?

“What, if anything, can change the paradigm of the Mariners needing to overspend to attract free agents in the future?” – @_esquilax

The combination of factors that make Seattle a tough sell for a free agent are pretty vast at the moment. Some of them are impossible to change – travel time, national media exposure, the offseason weather. So, to make it simple, I’d say you need two things to be proved. The first is that players can come to Seattle and end in a better/more marketable situation than they were before signing. Are players getting better under the tutelage of the Mariners? That’s a big one. The second is more simple and the absolver of all evils when it comes to sports – just win, baby.